Tattoo Removal: Lesson's Learned and Strength Given From God

Lesson's Learned and Strength Given From God

 Many of you may know many of you may not know I've been struggling, and been convicted to get rid of my tattoo's. Today was my first session and as I walked into the waiting room to get my new patient paper to fill out I could feel myself getting clammy and my palms starting to sweat. I arrived around 1:30pm, and it seems like they took forever to call me back to one of the rooms. While I sat in the office reading through the paper worked and all of the side effect from laser tattoo removal I felt as though I was going to chicken out. Finally one of the nurses called me back she got my weight and blood pressure and assured  me the doctor would be with me shortly. As I sat in one room waiting to be moved to another room, and then finally getting to meet the doctor I felt anxious and my blood pressure shot up. Finally the time came and the nurse moved me to the other room where the laser was for tattoo removal, along with meeting the doctor for the first time. Then the doctor came in for a brief minute to merely grab a pair of scissors, and he smiled and assured me I would be fine there is nothing to be nervous about. He came back in about twenty-five minutes later and said" well what would you like to know."  I said " First, off does it cost?" He smiled and said "Hmmmm those two tattoos I will do $150 per session." My next question as I'm sure you can guess was" how many sessions do you think it will take to remove them?" He said "6-10 it all depends on how deep the ink is and some other factors." I then ask " How bad is the pain?" I told him that "I had read it felt like rubber bands being snapped on your skin, and I've heard it's like a third degree burn." He said " Well my pain threshold isn't that high and I used this laser on myself." His next words were "Do you want  to go home and think about it or do you want to just go ahead with it?" He also said " We will do everything possible to make you as comfortable as possible." I said " Well I've been wanting to get rid of them for three years let's just go ahead and get it over." He smiled again and yelled to the nurses "We need a bag of ice." The nurse then brought the ice in and said " Where did the doctor go." While she went to look for him I sat there once again and anxiously waited. 

  After waiting for another fifteen minutes the doctor and nurse return. He said " Are you ready?"  I then said " I'm as ready as I will ever be I guess."  When he first started the laser and moved slowly it felt like rubber bands being snapped on my skin, as he went fast it felt like rubber bands snapping and a big time burn. The pain was excruciating I laid on the table and said " Lord help me to make it through this." As the pain intensified and got worse I found myself saying " Ouch, ouch, I don't  know if I'm going to make it through this." The doctor and nurse decided it was best to give me a break and to put some numbing cream on for a  half hour then go back to the laser again. While in the room waiting for the nurse to come get me again I let people know I needed some serious prayer. One of my dear friends respond with a lovely prayer. She said " Father, I lift Danielle to you, please give her the courage and strength to endure this pain. Give her peace in knowing that she is doing the right thing. I pray that you would  bind satan in her life that she would not become discouraged thru all of this but that she would be strong till this is finished! In Jesus name. Amen" For some reason this prayer put me at ease plus the numbing cream did help the pain some too. Finally I finished the session the doctor said " You did a great job." I walked out toward the waiting room to check out and set up my next appointment. They said "Well lets go for June 20, 2013 at 2:45pm." I said " That is fine I will let work know." After checking out I walked out into the warm breeze feeling strengthened by God and at peace with myself. 

 In all of this I've learned a lot about God and myself. First, I learned that God will make things possible when he sees fit. For me that meant waiting another year and getting back to working full-time. Second, I learned if that is truly your conviction the Lord will give you the strength and courage to get through anything. In the third and most obvious lesson I learned at the beginning of this journey is do not do it in the first place, and to always pray about things before jumping in both feet first. I hope this is somehow inspiring to everyone, and helps each one of you ladies to get through the week. Have a blessed week everyone til next time.

The Bigger Picture

The Bigger Picture

 The last few weeks have been pretty rough for me personally. One of the biggest things that has made it so rough is my parents health. My mom suffers with high blood pressure and neuropathy in her leggs. My dad recently had a knee replacement and used to be bow legged it so now one leg is straight and the other one is bowed out making it hard to walk he and my mom have both fallen many times. Plus my dad is also dealing with diabetes, and severe panic attacks. Sometimes the attacks are so bad he passes out. In for those of you who don't know they live two hours away. I've begged them to move closer because they are not getting the proper care from the physicians in West Virginia. However, I'm not sure if that will ever happen which really makes me worry about them.
 Due to all these things going on and being especially bad over the past month it has taken a toll on me. I struggle with trying to work two jobs, keeping house, and trying to be the best wife I can. My home health job is relatively new, and has been especially difficult over the past two weeks trying to deal with some pretty difficult clients.This has made me want to throw in the towel so to speak as far as nursing goes period. Over the past few days I've been praying and doing several Bible studies. I think God found a way to open my eyes again. Over the past two days I have been dealing with a very ill man. His wife explained to me my first day there he has cancer and they afraid it's spread to the nerves in his neck and will potentially go to his brain. He's has been sleeping a lot and I'm seeing changes in him that I've seen in many people right before they die. Today while I sat with him the bigger picture came into focus. The bigger picture is I'm a person who enjoys caring for others. I realized today I've nearly invested six months of myself into this new job. I firmly believe God has opened my eyes to this to let me know this is merely a trial and all will pass don't give up. Looking ahead I see what I would give up by simply quitting my job. In December I will be there for a year, which means I can take on even more benefits. 
It never ceases to amaze me how God shows us this bigger picture. He always has our best interest in mind. We are merely clay in his hands. With that said I want to leave you with a verse that really touched my heart this week and spoke to me. 

Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think anything as of ourselves; but our sufficiency is of God.
                                          2 Corinthians 3:5