The Bigger Picture

The Bigger Picture

 The last few weeks have been pretty rough for me personally. One of the biggest things that has made it so rough is my parents health. My mom suffers with high blood pressure and neuropathy in her leggs. My dad recently had a knee replacement and used to be bow legged it so now one leg is straight and the other one is bowed out making it hard to walk he and my mom have both fallen many times. Plus my dad is also dealing with diabetes, and severe panic attacks. Sometimes the attacks are so bad he passes out. In for those of you who don't know they live two hours away. I've begged them to move closer because they are not getting the proper care from the physicians in West Virginia. However, I'm not sure if that will ever happen which really makes me worry about them.
 Due to all these things going on and being especially bad over the past month it has taken a toll on me. I struggle with trying to work two jobs, keeping house, and trying to be the best wife I can. My home health job is relatively new, and has been especially difficult over the past two weeks trying to deal with some pretty difficult clients.This has made me want to throw in the towel so to speak as far as nursing goes period. Over the past few days I've been praying and doing several Bible studies. I think God found a way to open my eyes again. Over the past two days I have been dealing with a very ill man. His wife explained to me my first day there he has cancer and they afraid it's spread to the nerves in his neck and will potentially go to his brain. He's has been sleeping a lot and I'm seeing changes in him that I've seen in many people right before they die. Today while I sat with him the bigger picture came into focus. The bigger picture is I'm a person who enjoys caring for others. I realized today I've nearly invested six months of myself into this new job. I firmly believe God has opened my eyes to this to let me know this is merely a trial and all will pass don't give up. Looking ahead I see what I would give up by simply quitting my job. In December I will be there for a year, which means I can take on even more benefits. 
It never ceases to amaze me how God shows us this bigger picture. He always has our best interest in mind. We are merely clay in his hands. With that said I want to leave you with a verse that really touched my heart this week and spoke to me. 

Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think anything as of ourselves; but our sufficiency is of God.
                                          2 Corinthians 3:5